Again?

What is wrong with me?
I thought I had forgotten you.
But why?
Only one call, one telephone call,
and once again, I fell into your love trap.
I think I"m falling in love with you again.
I don't know whether this is a good or bad thing.

I really do miss you a lot.
Now I'm sitting in my room.
Looking at your bed which you used to sleep on it.
Looking at the blanket you used to cover yourself.
I still can feel your breath in the room.
Only now that I realised I didn't even forget about you.

I miss your smile and your laugh.
Although I always grumbled to you that I'm sleepy and want you to go to bed with me,
I really did enjoy those days with you.
You made my life no longer lonely. I don't have to sleep alone.
But now, you've gone.
Once again, I've gone back to the time I've to sleep alone.

I really miss you.
How I wish I could tell you how much do I miss you.
I still remember the last day you were in the hostel.
That night, I tried my best not to drop my tears in front of you.
I looked at you hugging the others.
How I wish that I could hug you at that time.
But, I didn't. Because I scared I can't hold any longer and drop all my tears in front of you.
I know you were looking at me when you returned to give back the paper but I refused to turn back.
I don't want to let you saw me streaming tears across my cheeks.
I don't want you to feel sad leaving the hostel.

Today, you've called me.
I'm really really happy.
But, when you mentioned about "her", I felt jealous.
Why must you mentioned about "her" when you're talking to me?
I know you like "her". But I was hoping that you could give both of us moment together.
Although I know that you're just treating me as your brother, I don't care.
I like you and I always do.

Anyway, I really looking forward for next sunday.
I really wish that this time you really do come back.
I can't wait to go and watch movie with you.
I love to go out with you as I could imagine myself dating with you though I know that will never happen in reality.

Good night, my loved one.